27
Mar
11

Sweetlips Jackson

First my dear friends, let me apologize for my recent absence.  As previously warned, my inspiration wanes in March and my passion to write anything suffers… a lot of little notes and scattered starts but nothing that stuck.  Below is a self-portrait of these past rainy weeks, hidden in seclusion, waiting for the spring and the return of my mojo.

Crowley pondering mortality in March

The good news is that over the past few days my passion and charm has begun to surface, begun to peer out, to the new months, the new adventures, the new seasons of the sun.  We are a few days away from April, 86 days into not drinking and four days, four hours and thirty seven minutes from opening day for the world-famous Philadelphia Phillies.

Now as things turned around, it was time to replace my beloved Foxface with a new family member.

Good old Foxface celebrating a Phillies win over the Dodgers (August 2010)

Picking a new fish is like picking your outfit for the first day of school.  Important. A lot goes into it.  You can only have so many fish in your tank at a time, and they usually last a few years so you must pick wisely.  It is also important to have a reliable fish guy.  My fish guy is as important as my lawyer, especially nowadays  as I don’t get jammed up that much anymore.  Some of these guys are real douche bags, rolling their eyes condescendingly as you tell them your tank problems or ask them a question.  It’s pretty annoying in all honesty because I just want to say, ” Listen ass bag, you spend eight hours a day with fish, 40 hours a week of your life is spent feeding and cleaning and talking and blah, blah ,blah.  Now I know things probably aren’t that hot for you in life, and I am sure you are one of those guys who masturbates to cartoon porn.  But listen, I concede, you know more about fish then me,  so just tell me what I am doing wrong, overcharge me for this bullshit seaweed I am feeding them and let me be on my way. Anyway, you can see the importance of a good fish guy.

My guy Terry recently left his store and moved to a store about a half-hour away from me called Strictly Fish.  This was inconvenient but I am a pretty loyal guy and, as I said before, you get a good fish guy you have to follow him.  I decided my grieving was over for Foxface  and it was time to move on so I paid Terry a visit.  He was happy to see me and said a few kind words about Foxface as a youth.  I told him I was looking for a new fish, and he began to show me what he had and what would fit with my tank.  We came to a fish called a Sweetlip and I reminisced to my college days.  Now I was never called Sweetlips by anyone but I probably should of been somewhere along the line, little girls in the back of the class chewing their gum and twirling their hair. “What’s his name?” one would say. “I don’t know but I heard they call him Sweetlips.” They would giggle and sigh as I gently flipped through a copy of Baudelaire’s Les Fleurs du mal, pretending not to notice, looking dangerous and vulnerable.

Anyway, I decided Sweetlips was perfect.  This was my new fish.

Sweetlips Jackson relaxing at home

After a few days in the tank it became obvious that his name was Sweetlips Jackson, and I am proud to report he has been home for three weeks and is doing great.

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1 Response to “Sweetlips Jackson”


  1. 1 Arch
    March 27, 2011 at 8:11 pm

    Crawley- Diggin’ the blog and sweetlips. Keep it going.


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